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Why you hire a professional photographer.

Sometimes, when I am in my time-suck otherwise known as, Pinterest. I come across something and I’m all, “Oh. This is happening.”
A certain Superman picture (that has since been taken off Pinterest. Boo.) made me think of this little boy: 
As a photographer.. I can make a lot of things happen if you show me a picture you are going for. I know what I am doing there. I may not be a Photoshop genius, but for the most part, I can make things happen. 
The problem is when you, the photographer, want someone else to take a picture for you. No matter if you describe to a T or even show them the picture, most likely, they won’t get it. 
J was pretty pumped about the picture. We tried to take it at the party and after two hours of hell, trying to Photoshop Claire into a picture, John took one look and said, “No. I need to be in a suit.” Well.. okay. Wish I would have known that on Sunday. 
So, I gather the supplies and tell John to meet me at his mom’s after work and we are doing. this. picture. 
He starts in on how he needs Clark Kent glasses.. um. Okay. Then you need to go find them. He wants me to grab some 3D glasses (!?!?!) and bring them. Done.
About 3 minutes into this photo op, I want to chunk these glasses in the road. He wants to be throwing them.. Um. Okay. 
And we have a 5 year old and a 2 year old. 
Pictures are hard for kids that age. I know. This is my life. I get it. 
I also use tricks and noises and generally act like a fool to get kids to look at the camera and sometimes it doesn’t work. 
We took 99 pictures to try to get this family picture. (NINETY-NINE.) 
(Side note: I am doing a Project 12- one family photo a month for a year and it may kill me)

While I am not showing you all 99.. I am showing you a few of the gems we have. This is why you hire a professional people! Which is what I really need to do. But I am stubborn.

This is just a Hot Mess. 

John is giving the air gun to someone…

Could have been cute if it weren’t for those stupid glasses.

Claire has found a present for you. 

C is frightened by how horrific this is turning out. 

Addy is clearly over this. And John is about to blow a gasket 

Who are these kids?!!?

Clearly I am arguing with Addy about her pink camera. John looks more like a Blues Brother than Clark Kent
Oh What’s that, Rachel? You smelled a fart? 
John says it looks like I have scoop like Lois Lane.. I think I am smelling more farts. 

This is the best we could do. And Yes. Some people have been photoshopped into these family pictures. 
Family pictures… will drive a photographer to drink. 

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